I caught a fish so big, it was the size of a whale. Seriously, a whale. Well, maybe a pygmy whale, but still a whale.
It was the size of a house. Really! A house! Maybe a two bedroom mobile home, but that's still a house.
This fish was roomy inside - large enough to wander around in and live in. Not that I did those things or anything. I'm just imagining of course. I mean, he was on my hook. We all know who caught who.
This fish wasn't just big, he was strong. He really put up a fight, but I was prepared to win that battle. I was ready to hold onto my pole all night if that's what it took to wear him down and reel him in.
That fish really got the Coast Guard's attention too. I think they were impressed. Very impressed that I was able to hang onto the pole and not fall out my boat while that hulk of a fish dragged me around the harbor at 100 miles an hour.
Seriously. 100 miles an hour. People on the shore were nailing planks across their windows. They thought a hurricane was coming from the wind and the waves me and that giant fish were making. Which is really impressive if you consider that we were on a lake in Colorado.
The Coast Guard wanted to help me reel that spectacular fish in. Frankly, I think they wanted to share credit for the catch with me - and steal the spotlight - and maybe get invited to the huge Fish Fry Party I was planning as I raced round and round that lake.
Frankly, the Coast Guard wasn't as much help as I thought they would be. I had to do all the work myself. I think they knew they were a huge disappointment. They called out something on their big horn about a ticket for speeding around the lake. I don't blame them. They had to do something to save face.
In the end, no one could help. It was just me and the colossal fish. And that was the way I wanted it to be. A battle of wits and strength. Who would be master of the sea - or the lake - in the end? Who was the most determined? Who was the savviest? Who was the hungriest?
Okay, you got me. He was the hungriest, but I still maintain I was the savviest. Unfortunately hunger is a more pressing need than the desire to make other fisherman jealous of your large catch. Yes, hunger won out that day.
I bet old Moby impressed his other enormous fish friends when he caught me. Maybe he's telling some fish tales of his own. I mean, I'm quite a catch. I put up an amazing fight. Man against beast. It really could have gone either way. Maybe he won first prize for the biggest catch of the day.
Yeah, I'm certain he did. I mean, I'm no small fry. I'm a giant of the land. I'm the size of a car! A golf cart maybe, but that's still a vehicle of transportation. If he didn't win first place, my humongous fish was robbed.
I just hope he tells the story properly or no one is going to believe him. I mean, it's kind of incredible, him catching an amazing fisherman like me. I am known and feared in that lake.
Poor guy. Yeah, those other fish are going to think he's telling tales.
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